Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Dating rules for building a new Relationship


Dating rules for building a new Relationship

Whether you’ve been in a prior relationship or not, every relationship is different from the other, and you cannot treat two relationships the same way. Being in a new relationship often puts you in a state of confusion because you’re unsure of how to proceed and take things up by a notch. Here is a guide on how to go about with dating in a brand new relationship.

1). WORK ON THE COMFORT LEVEL Getting comfortable with your partner becomes extremely important in the beginning of a new relationship. He needs to know how comfortable you are around him, so that he knows how to proceed. Your comfort level with your spouse will support you take things further with him. If something bothers you, don’t hesitate to tell him. If you fear that he may not take it in the right way, you’re only making things more difficult for yourself.

2). GO SLOW Give your relationship some time and figure out the pace with which you want to proceed. You shouldn’t feel like he’s hurrying you into it, or vice-versa.

Dating rules for building a new Relationship

3). DIVIDE YOUR TIME WELL Don’t forget that you had a life of your own before you got into a new relationship. Spend enough time with your partner, but don’t forget your friends and yourself. ‘Me time’ is important and you should indulge in it. Says finance professional Aarti Trivedi, “When I met my now husband, it was natural that I wanted to spend all my time with him. And while my friends understood that, eventually we started drifting apart. Thankfully, I could repair the damage before it was too late. Falling in love is alright but I firmly believe, not at the cost of friendships.”

4). DON’T COMPARE Don’t compare the new guy with your ex-boyfriend, it’s not fair to him. Remember that everyone is different. It doesn’t matter how your ex was, because if he really was that nice, you wouldn’t be with someone else right now. Shares fitness professional Sneha Sawant, “Comparisons are inevitable when it comes to current partners and exes. I made the same mistake when I met my current boyfriend — mentally I would keep comparing him to my ex and over time, it started affecting our relationship. A couple of times I even told him how my ex would do things in a certain way and naturally, it didn’t go down too well with him. Fortunately, before things got out of hand, I realised what I was doing and stopped. I made peace with my past and decided never to compare them again. Our relationship has improved a lot since then.”

5). DON’T TEXT ABOUT IMPORTANT MATTERS Texting is a nice way to stay in touch with him while you’re at work or busy with stuff. When it comes to speaking about matters which are important, call him up or meet him and discuss them. Important matters have to be discussed in person and not via texts.

6). GIVE HIM HIS SPACE It’s understood if you feel like spending all your time with him since you’re into something very new. But understand that giving him his space won’t do any harm to your relationship. Everyone needs some time off to do their own thing and it doesn’t matter what he actually does in his ‘me’ time. Says advertising professional Prachi Sharma, “Giving space to your partner is important because otherwise the relationship gets claustrophobic. At the beginning of a relationship, it is understandable to want to spend all your time with one’s partner and know what they are up to when you’re apart. I was so enamoured by my partner that I would feel bad every time he wanted to do something without me. But soon I realised that I was being unreasonable and things became better when I back off a little. My boyfriend appreciated it, too and today we’re stronger than ever.”

7). KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH A FIGHT Every couple has fights and it’s part and parcel of being in a relationship. When in a new relationship, don’t stretch an argument too long and try to keep your ego aside. Instead, talk things out with him. Tell yourself that everyone has a right to an opinion and just because the two of you have different opinions on a subject, doesn’t make either of you wrong. Be mature and considerate in an argument instead of insulting or hurting your partner. Don’t say things that you will regret later.

8). FIND OUT MORE ABOUT THE OTHER Since you’re in a new relationship, you don’t know everything that he likes doing, his favourite sport, the kind of food he likes. Find out about what he likes to do in his free time. You never know, it might just be one of the things you like too.

9). SPEND TIME TOGETHER Once you introduce him to your friends, finding alone time becomes pretty difficult. Keep one day in the week, where it’s just the both of you doing things you both like.

10). START WITH SEXTING If you’re someone who isn’t comfortable with sex in a new relationship, then talking to him directly about it may help. You can start with sexting actually. It benefits to solve the tension before you get to doing things.

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